It's been a long time coming...

White butterfly...

I've been in a weird mood lately. Hopefully I will snap out of it. Every little thing has been making me upset, and usually I'm pretty decent at just brushing the small things off. I think I need to learn how to forgive. There are certain people in my life that I probably won't ever have a desire to reconcile with... and I think that in itself I have come to terms with. But, certain others I need to find it within myself to let the past and even the present go, and move on and forgive. It's something I struggle with. I'm always the first one saying, "There are more important things in life to worry about." All too often though I am the last one practicing that same idea. I've been realizing lately how much more I need to grow and mature as a person. I suppose that's a step in the right direction though. I need to grow up and chill out.

I was running out of gas today and I thank goodness I was because the following helped to make my day so much better. I pulled in to Circle K off of Rt. 8 and began to fill my tank up. A small white butterfly was flying around and I thought, "Oh, that's nice, I wish it would land on me." Well, it did. It hung out on my leg while I pumped the gas. For those of you who know me, you know my families connection with white butterflies, and how important something like this would mean to me. Then it flew to my car, and then to the pavement. It was the most calm butterfly I have ever seen.

Well, no. There was a blue one in Joshs' backyard that I got to feed before it died. Anyways... the white butterfly today was very special and made me realize that everything will be okay. I felt at ease, and more peaceful.

I took some pictures but none of them turned out very good.

It's events like todays that make me wonder, and make me wish everything made more sense to me. If I could make a real wish everyday of my life, it would be for clarity and to gain an understanding without having to go through all the confusion and questioning.

TheresaClare

p.s. I can't stop listening to Justin Nozuka.

One Thing Is For Sure

I love the Spill Canvas song called "One Thing Is For Sure."

"There are things in this world, that I don't understand.
Like: Love, war, gravity, or the lay of the land."

I am in love with Justin Nozuka as of this evening when I stumbled upon him on Amazon.com. Google him. Fall in love too. He is going to be in Cleveland Sept.30th and I really would love to go.

Life is good ya'll. :-)

TheresaClare

I am in the computer lab listening to people gossip about old high school gossip.

Subbing last night was a ton of fun, and I get to do it again tonight. It'll be nice to have that extra money in my paycheck.

I'm uninspired to write in a blog, but it has been awhile so I thought I'd try.

I'm tired.

TheresaClare

I didn't sleep at all last night.

TheresaClare

Your mother suckles pigs.

I am whoring the internet at Liz's apartment tonight. I was hoping to get school work done, but that def. didn't happen. I will probably have a lot of homework to get done this weekend. I'm trying very hard to stay focused on doing well in school. I made a promise to do so. It's hard to find the inspiration sometimes though.

I'm really tired and am probably going to leave soon so this will be short and sweet.

My 3 girls that I teach jazz too have a long way to go but I think that it'll be a fun and productive road.

I don't have scoliosis, my back is not fractured. Those are the most important findings of the day. I spent the entire day (almost) in either Dr. B's office or Dr. C's. It's a relief to find out that my back isn't totally fucked up. I'm too tired to explain what is really going on with it.

Potential employment opportunities keep being thrown my way. I'm going to have to weigh my options because I cannot let myself get overwhelmed.

My body is so tired, and somewhat hungry so I need to go home now.

Before I go though, there is one more thing I need to share:

Your mother suckles pigs.

French: Votre mère allaite des porcs.

German: Deine Mutter säugt Schweine.

Italian: La vostra madre allatta i maiali.

Spanish: Tu madre da de mamar a cerdos.

Until next time babes,
TheresaClare

p.s. I don't advise cracking your neck or back. Ever.

Gradisco i vostri bambini. Quanto è il ragazzo?

Today was a busy day due to the fact that I still cannot move my neck or upper back; dang ballet class... or was it ballet?

Haha apparently I may have scoliosis. I might not. Who knows? But the X-Ray of my back looks like a backwards C. And did you also know that your neck, when looking at it from the side, is supposed to be convex? Mine is concave (The picture is a neck that is correct. Mine has the exact opposite curve, weird). The doctor seemed a bit confused as to why that was and kept asking if I have ever been in a major car accident (I have not) or if I have ever fallen really hard or been body slammed by someone (no joke he asked that). I'm kind of glad that I really didn't pull a dumb ass move in ballet class to injure myself... but I'm also just as not glad that there is a bigger underlying problem. I may have stress fractures in my lower back too. The next couple days will determine all of this. I'm sure I'm fine and that it's all just a bunch of blah blah blah speculation.

What I know right now is that Dr. B, my new chiropractor, pushed and pulled and cracked my body in ways it did not appreciate, until now. I can look straight in front of me now and not just to the left with a cocked head ha. I still cannot look to my right which causes a slight problem when trying to merge over to various lanes on the highway. I cross my fingers and just go.

I go back to see Dr. B tomorrow after ballet class, and I also go see Dr. C after Microeconomics for more X-Rays. It's going to be a very busy day. The funniest bit of this all was def. teaching my 5 hip hop classes. I'm sure everyone would find it amusing that my girls looked left during the majority of the combinations, due to my own inability to turn it right.

So who's excited about the 90s dance and turning 19 party that's on Friday? I sure am. Sarahhhhhimmmemswdkelman.

In Learning Theory we took a test to determine the type of person we are. I am the following:

I am moderately an extrovert. True.
I am slightly intuitive. I am one who prefers Sensing to take in info through the five senses and focus on the here and now. True.
I am clear when it comes to feeling (clear is the 2nd highest score you can get). So I very much prefer feeling and tend to make decisions based primarily on values and on subjective evaluation of person-centered concerns. Very True.
I am clear when it comes to perceiving. I prefer this and like a flexible and spontaneous approach to life and prefer to keep their options open. True.

And to sum it all up in the exact words on my form:

Warmly enthusiastic and imaginative. See life as full of possibilities. Make connections between events and information very quickly, and confidently proceed based on the patterns they see. Want a lot of affirmation from others and readily give appreciation and support. Spontaneous and flexible, often rely on their ability to improvise and their verbal fluency.

Very true.



Todays inappropriate-ness-ess is as follows:

I would like to buy your children.
How much is the boy?

French: J’aime vos enfants.
Combien coûte le garçon?

German: Ich mag deine Kinder.
Was kostet der Junge?

Italian: Gradisco i vostri bambini.
Quanto è il ragazzo?

Spanish: Me gustaría comprarte los hijos.
¿Cuánto vale el niño?

In the words of both Mikey and Dr. B,
Okay byeee!

TheresaClare

p.s. My mom is an amazing mom. She and I had a fight with the dishes in my sink this evening.

Stronzata

Liz and I went to church this morning. Neither of us were really all that impressed. I think I'll try a different one. Well, no, I know that I'm going to try a different one.

I have a lot of catching up to do for school. But this semester I have my shit together and I just finished a fabulous paper for ballet class. It only took me a half an hour, and last semester I would have half-ass finished it at 3 in the morning...maybe.

It feels good to be responsible.

Speaking of which, everyone has been banned from my apartment (even Liz) and from my car (except Liz) until I clean. This is what I figure... If Kate can do it with 8 kids running around, then what the hell is my problem? Right? It'll be finished by next Tuesday evening (the 16th).

I must read for tap class.

Listening to the band Say Anything makes me want to have sex; strange, I know. It's a good group though. Listen to "Alive With the Glory of Love" and maybe you'll get it.

Okay, byeee!
TheresaClare


P.S. Let's swear in other languages:

Bullshit

French: Des conneries!

German: Kacke

Italian: Stronzata

Spanish: Y una mierda

Feel free to correct any errors.

God and Mutual Masturbation

I started reading this book today, it's called I'm Fine with God... It's Christians I Can't Stand. I'm not so sure I'm going to be fine with this book to be honest with you. I read all of the chapter names and they are so negative. I think I may have made a bad buy with this one.

Speaking of bad buys. I'm not spending my money anymore. Not on anything. Not food, nothing. It's going to be refreshing and I'm excited about it. I need to live more simplistically.

Now for this book...

Something from the book I could agree with (pages 7 and 8):

The clown (literally) who sat in the end-zone seats at every Super Bowl. He was easy to spot. He wore the rainbow colored wig, and he held up a large "John 3:16" sign where the television camera set up for a field goal attempt. Did he really think that people would stop watching the game on TV so they could look up that Scripture in a Bible that is conveniently nearby on the buffet table between the Budweiser and the pork rinds?

Something I find to be a bit harsh (page 8):

The Christian plumber who advertises in the yellow pages with a big fish symbol displayed prominently in the ad. The sign on the fish was an effective secret symbol among Christians in the first century AD, when being identified as a Christian meant being used as lion bait in the Roman Coliseum. But 20 centuries later that fish symbol means this: "Hey, come to me for your plumbing repairs. I may do a lousy job cleaning your clogged pipes, and I might charge you more than the other guys, but at least you'll be reamed by a fellow Christian."

And so I keep reading...

So how about the slogan "God Hates Fags!" that was on the signs outside of Matthew Shephards funeral. I'm not even going to comment on my feelings towards those people (who count how many days Matthew has been in hell and who post similar signs at his grave site on the anniversary of his death each year...what the fuck). God doesn't hate gay people. That's something I will never agree with. I will never think that a man and a man together is wrong, or that a woman and a woman is wrong. Never. Love towards another is not something one should have to deny, or hide, or ignore. Ever.



On a lighter note, New Kids on the Block are back, This is obviously one of the worst mistakes in music history. It's sad to me when a famous individual or group does not understand that their time is up and that they should cherish the fame and fortune they had rather than painfully dragging it out. New Kids on the Block were the shit... back in the day. Them coming back as the same group at 30+ years of age is in a way disrespecting the success they rightfully obtained as teenagers.

You are a group of grown men and you are going to sing the lyrics "I want to be your boyfriend" over and over again? This is something the Jonas Brothers could get away with. Not even Hanson could get away with that anymore... and they are half your age.



I am obsessed with Skype now. I am constantly on it. There is a slight problem though. My sweet and innocent self genuinely wants to meet people from various walks of life, so when I put myself in 'SkypeMe' mode this is what I am naively expecting. About 2 minutes later (haha and it just happened as I was typing that) a person will IM me or attempt to call me and say a version of the following...

"i lick your wet pussy cam2cam u and i fun times virtual sex"
(followed by a creepy emoticon of a blossoming flower or a bright yellow sexy smiley face)
There is a time and a place for those sexy emoticons.

And it's never a complete or true sentence. My 'Blocked' list is longer than my 'Contacts' list. I just had to block a fellow from Holland named Rob. He is blocked user number 37.

Mike Stone and I did have some fun with it the other day though. I was a 58 year old woman using a picture of her daughter as a decoy. This poor Russian boy (29 years of age... claiming to be 26) just wanted to masturbate in front of the computer. He left with a life lesson, a limp dick, and a smile on his face... and then he was blocked. He learned the following:

• When your camera is on don't rub your chest... it's creepy.
• Lie about your age one more time boy cause I still don't believe you. (And yes, I finally got the real age)
• Don't be so desperate that when you find out I am not the girl in the picture, but the 58 year old wrinkly pussy mother, you still seek virtual pleasure. It's pathetic.
  
• When you are dating a woman don't go online for some virtual mutual masturbation. It's a slap in her face. Maybe she would be better in bed if you weren't such a hornball and romanced her once in awhile.

That was my good deed for the day. He learned some good lessons.

A fellow from Morocco just, well shit I'll post the conversation (key points in blue... amazing things are in bold haha):

magicien says: (handshake)
Theresa Clare says: hi
magicien says: how r u
Theresa Clare says: good. u?
magicien says: happy
magicien says: i am khalid 23 years from morocco,i serach talk with seriouse girls
Theresa Clare says: are you in school
magicien says: yes,I am technician in mechanical manufacture
magicien says: and you ?
magicien says: i searcj relation seriouse with girls married
Theresa Clare says: you search for marriage?
magicien says: yes
Theresa Clare says: sorry
magicien says: marriage all time
magicien says: i am not playing
Theresa Clare says: i am not interested
magicien says: ok,bye
Theresa Clare says: haha
Theresa Clare says: bye
magicien says: i am seriou men,and i dont like playing with girls
Theresa Clare says: ok byeeeee
magicien says: bye sisters



He is a serious man you guys, seriously.


Till next time ya'll,
TheresaClare

P.S. Listen to James Morrison and fall in love with his voice just as I have. I recommend the songs "This Boy", "If the Rain Must Fall", "Under the Influence", and "You Give Me Something"<-- Esp. this one. :-)

Can someone please explain to me where the dinosaurs fit in to this picture? I find it hard to get by the fairy tale quality of everything... and the ability for everyone to interpret it all differently.




Well... I have lost some weight this week. That's for sure.
Theresa

Ever since Sunday I have not been feeling well. I thought I was better earlier this week, but now my fever is back.

Dance classes started yesterday. On Wednesdays I teach a jazz class for 3 ten year olds and my adult strength and conditioning class. I'm excited to start teaching all of my hip-hop classes next Monday. I have more than double the students that I had last year. :-) I had 12 students last year and now I have 34. My jazz class started 15 minutes late because the class before went over 15 minutes (unacceptable). So hopefully that doesn't happen again.

Friday and Saturday are my last days at Body Shop. Sad kinda.

I'm not very good at blogging. Nothing that interesting is going on.

TheresaClare

I have been reading a lot lately which has been nice. Lots of different books. I find it hard to just stick to one at a time; the book I read changes depending on my mood.

Oh, and I bought a bible. It's pink.

TheresaClare

My sister, Helen, is celebrating her 24th birthday today.

This is my new blog, I suppose it's the thing to do these days.

--Theresa Clare